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Please let them go....

I have the privilege of teaching college students and find this to be one of the more fulfilling jobs that I've ever had. College students bring an energizing passion for life, faith, and justice that is incredibly contagious. I can often see myself in their lives and stories. It was only 12 years ago that I graduated with my undergraduate degree. Now I've been married for over a decade and pregnant with our third child. I'm still cool enough to connect and old enough to counsel. It's this time of year that students stop by after class and ask if I "have some time to talk." My mind quickly scans over their academic performance, potential red flags I've noticed in attendance, behavior, or attitude, and agree to set aside some time to see them. Sometimes their concerns are about mental health as they know I am also a mental health therapist. I assess them for safety, affirm them for coming forward, and pass them along to a competent, licensed clinician. Bu...
Recent posts

To those whose lives are changed by a new school year....

When I was a kid my best friend and I would always say that we wanted to be teachers. I remember thinking that grading papers would be quite fulfilling. While my buddy went on to complete her education degree, I worked towards my social work degree and figured my childhood goal was just an overflow of my desire to hold my teachers' hands. Fast forward eleven years after college graduation and I get to be a teacher after all. And now that I'm a mom, a teacher, and I have the privilege to walk alongside students and at-risk children, I think I can somewhat connect to the various fears, joys, and experiences that come with a new school year. Dear Parents, May you feel peace that your children are equipped for the things they will face this upcoming school year. And even if they're not ready, may God give them the grace and resilience they need to grow from adversity. May you muster up the courage to trust their teachers to guide their morality a...

Home

My husband and I went away to a lake with a group of friends last weekend with no kids. This is a big deal for all of us. We anticipate weekends like this for months and months....and then it's over. On the drive home I avoid bathroom breaks and speed down gravel roads so I can pick up my kids as quickly as possible. This is partly because I feel somewhat guilty for "burdening" my amazing sister with a snotty nosed, poor sleeping 9 month old and our sassy little 3 year old girl. Plus I'm certain my daughter is missing me as much as I miss her. "She doesn't even ask for you," my sister says. "Oh really? Well that's good I guess...where is she?" Tenley peaks her head out of the office door, "I don't want to come home EVER AGAIN!"  This phrase has been blurted out on more than one occasion when we're on our way home from various outings. I'm not sure if home is really boring for her or if she just wants t...

Slow Down...

It's hard isn't it? Being a parent I mean. Sometimes I think it's worse that I'm a mental health therapist AND a parent. Heck I even teach future social workers how to help people with the messes in this world. One would think this would be great right? I should know nearly  everything  about the right way to raise kids and maintain a healthy, vibrant marriage. I should know about proper attachment behaviors, effective discipline, appropriate words to say, when to say them, how often to encourage, re-direct, and what swear words to keep to myself (okay all swear words should be kept to myself). We prayed for years to be able to have biological children and as we waited I just knew I would be a great mom. Now that I am one I have to admit that my insecurities and fears are sometimes overwhelming. I work with children and families every day that struggle with deep hurts. Parents struggle with addiction, anger, co-dependenc...